The title of my blog describes me to a tee, I recently got back into my love for reading and wanted to share my thoughts. I started enjoying a glass of wine to help me relax and find time for myself by reading a good book.
Blinded by lust and a sexual high like no other, I failed to see the
warning signs that my swinging lifestyle was about to crash and burn. Or
maybe I just chose to look the other way when I sensed it in my bones
creeping up on us.
My husband had slowly transformed into a roommate I kissed goodnight before
going to sleep. Peter, my sexual partner, became the man who controlled me
and whose words and actions affected me more than the man I said my vows
with. Was I a fool to put my trust in him? Was I naïve to expect my lover
to treat me with the respect and kindness that monogamous couples cherish?
To the outside world, the four of us looked like best friends, close-knit
people who spent time together, took care of each other, and had the time
of their lives. And, we were just that…for a time. And then it all began to
I’m sure he realized the minute he had me with that hug and felt me relax
and melt into him that I was taking the step toward forgiveness. It was a
genuine hug from both of us, and I think we both poured a lot of emotion
into it when words just wouldn’t work. I looked up at him and then he
cupped my face with his hands and started kissing me. Neither of us had to
say a word—all the apologies were in that kiss. A kiss that said neither of
us wanted to lose this. A kiss that said it was all too good to screw up
over some stupid comment. It had been nine days since he last touched me,
and my body went from a slow simmer to on fire in seconds. We went from
sweet kisses to the ones of hunger and need. His lips were delivering the
message of urgency and I need inside of you now. I heard Colt and Mary
talking somewhere in the distance. I was too consumed by this man to pay
any attention to them.
He eased me back on the bed we had laid claim to for the night. Clothes
went flying to the floor while his fingers checked my folds to make sure
“she” still wanted him; “she” didn’t disappoint and was soaking wet. He
gave that little moan and sighed “She’s always wet me for me.” Seconds
later he was buried to the hilt in my heat. I almost came on the spot it
felt so good. I closed my eyes just to feel while he cupped my face with
his hands and started kissing me. He wanted me to remember who it was that
consumed me, controlled me. How could I forget? When sex is so hot it
literally seers your brain, you can’t think of anything else.